Jsack's Mom's Blog

Welcome to my blog where I share my special needs parenting journey with my heart, truth, and love, one story at a time. ā¤ļø

Pet

I’ve been thinking a lot about my childhood. Things that made me happy, sad, and comfortable in my own skin. I was born two days after my oldest sisters graduation. My Mom and Dad came home with me from the hospital and my middle sister wanted a baby brother. My Dad did the next best thing and got her a dog. He was a black Labrador Retriever and he was named Bo. What an amazing dog he was by far the best pet I ever had theprivilege to love. We didn’t own him he owned our hearts. I don’t even have a picture of him, and if one exists it’s living on a slide. I was born in the day when film was developed into slides. And I’ve acquired quite a collection from my Dad. My long term goal is to convert them to digital and make copies on CD.  

This isnt my dog , but he sure looks like him. Image found on http://www.321dogs.com

Bo was a truly amazing dog, I grew up with him as he 
was just a puppy when my Dad brought him home. He would let my sister and I dress him up in my brother’s t-shirts, hats, and he even let us put a cigar in his mouth! He loved is and was our other brother with fur. When my parents marriage ended and my Mom, sister, and I went to live somewhere else Bo came with us. My Dad didn’t want to split us up and really that was the kindest thing he could do as I was only four and my heart was broken. Bo was my best friend and allowed me to cry and hug him so tight. His fur would be soaked with my tears and yet there he would stay. He got me through many heartaches in my life breakups, arguments with my family, and feeling lonely. We spent so much time together over the years, and Bo would walk my sister and I to and from the bus stop every day. He was our neighbourhood dog and everyone loved him. He would get us home from school, play, and then go off to do his visiting rounds. He would end up at our neighbours down the road, hanging out with their little dog. Across from our home was a field all the kids in the neighbourhood would get together and play baseball and football down there. It was so much fun to see Bo getting excited and chasing the baseball when it would get hit. And since I was an excited child is always throw my bat, and he’d chase after it and bring it back to the next batter up. I still have that wonder bat, my Lousiville Slugger. 

This is a picture of what my bat looks like. It’s a childs version and it goes with me, wherever I live.

As I got older Bo slowed down a lot more. He got more grey

on his whiskers and the tuft of white fur became grayer as well.  He’d still come to to meet us at the bus stop, but he’d sleep in longer in the mornings. I remember the day I could see him out the bus window as I was coming home. All of us kids would knock on the window and wave at him. Suddenly an image flashed in my head and it was dog’s face with fear in his eyes. When I snapped out of it, I opened up my window and yelled at Bo to go home. He couldn’t hear me and I saw his fear filled face and he disappeared under the wheels. I was just sick and ran to the front and demanded my bus driver let out. He did immediately when he saw the tears starting to form in my eyes. 

This was a traumatic memory for me. I didnt look or speak to my busdriver for a long time after.

I ran to see Bo laying there on the front of our neighbours lawn. His fur was matted with blood and when I hugged him he yelped. I continue to pat his head and pray that he was going to be okay. Soon I was surrounded by a crowd of my friends and my sister and our Mom were there beside me. I listened to Bo’s panting and nuzzled my face into his and felt his soft breath on my cheek. I didn’t want to leave him but my Mom was guiding me away and our neighbour was coming to help attend to our dog brother. 


It was two days before my twelfth birthday and I had to say goodbye to my best friend. This happened thirty years ago and I’ve never forgotten it, not wrote about it till now. A piece of my heart went away with my beloved Bo that day. An amazing dog, brother, and best friend. He was very friendly, socially inept, a great temperament and best family pet I could ever ask for. I haven’t wanted to own a pet since that day. But if I ever do it will be a black Labrador Retriever. My oldest son asked me when he was four, if he could have a puppy or a baby brother. I came through on my end of the bargain, so for now we enjoy our visits with our neighbours dog. It makes me smile when I see my youngest son running up and down the yard with Frankie the daschund. I close my eyes and I can see my beloved Bo running on the rainbow bridge. 

This has been my submission to https://lindaghill.com SOCS please check out hers and all the other talent that link up. Thank you for stopping by today. šŸ’“

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Fridays Feats and Fails

It’s Friday one day closer to the weekend and wow what a week it’s been!!! I’m excited to share it with you. So let’s get to it shall we? I’m so happy and honoured to be co-hosting Friday’s Feats and Fails with the awesome Ash from http://www.morethancheeseandbeer. This is a new adventure for me so I feel giddy with excitement. šŸ˜ƒšŸŽ‰šŸ’ƒ

FEAT-Amazing Grace

My beautiful cousin brought her baby into the world and I haven’t stopped crying since! Amazing Grace was diagnosed in utero as having mosaic triploidy. According to Wikipedia.org research Triploid syndrome is an extremely rare chromosomal disorder. Individuals with triploid syndrome have three of every chromosome, i.e. a total of sixty-nine rather than the normal forty-six chromosomes. There are only sixty recorded cases across the world. Thanks to the research I found on http://www.mommiesofmiracles.com I’m understanding a lot more. These children are blessings, and although there genetically different abled, they are beautiful gifts to the world. 

A Mother’s Love šŸ’—

Amazing Grace was brought into the world on Tues, March. 10 th at 6:04 am she had a healthy delivery and Mom and baby have been doing well. Grace had a defect with her heart diagnosed in utero and no one has known how long she would be earth side. After receiving a heart scan yesterday my cousin was happy to report this morning, that there are NO signs of the defect!!! God is creating miracles for my family daily as Amazing Grace has been defeating the odds against her since her conception. Just yesterday she opened up her eyes for the first time her Uncle held her. Oh and what a beautiful moment that was!  There has been an amazing photographer that has been capturing Grace’s journey with her Mom and Dad. All images are by Love by Krista Evans Photography and she and my cousin have allowed me to share them with you today. šŸ’•

A Father’s Love ā¤ļø

I read all the updates eagerly each moment that my cousin posts them. Today Grace will have a brain scan as she was also diagnosed with agenisus of corpus callosum. According to research from Wikipedia.org (ACC) is a rare birth defect (congenital disorder) in which there is a complete or partial absence of the corpus callosum. It occurs when the corpus callosum, the band of white matter connecting the two hemispheres in the brain, fails to develop normally, typically during pregnancy. 

Amazing Grace is being tested and evaluated in preparation to going home! She’s  classified as a strong baby, despite the disorders and her early arrival of eight days before her due date. The amount of love and prayers that are surrounding Grace and her parents is incredible! Thanks to Krista at Love by Krista Evans Photography 12,000 people have seen my family’s pictures. To me that means that 12,000 people are joining in prayer power! You can view Krista’s amazing body of work here:

https://www.facebook.com/lovebykristaevansphotography


The love, pride, and powerful energy emanating from this family fills my heart to the brim. šŸ’–

FAIL

I’ve been keeping as positive as I can considering how precious life really is. And my own son has to undergo genetic testing for Fragile X and ASD. According to Wikipedia.org Fragile X  is a genetic syndrome. Nearly half of all children with fragile X syndrome meet the criteria for a diagnosis of autism.[1] It is an inherited cause of intellectual disability especially among boys. It results in a spectrum of intellectual disabilities ranging from mild to severe as well as physical characteristics. I’ve had my moments when I’ve dissolved into tears, yelled, cursed, and locked myself away in my pity party of one.

My incredible family has shown me I can have those moments but I just can’t unpack and live there. So other than not cleaning since last weekend, not keeping up with folding my laundry as that relentless bitch is owning me. I’ve been enjoying the sunshine, adventuring with my kids, and counting my blessings. And really appreciating the miracles in life like Amazing Grace’s journey with her phenomenal parents. The strength they’ve shown has been remarkable. In my cousins words to prepare for a life half way through pregnancy, then a possible death, back to preparing for her baby’s life is an extraordinary blessing. I know God will continue to watch over and bless them as they are all miracles of the heart.  šŸ’ž

Amazing Grace.šŸ’–

FEAT

My Captain’s hockey play off round ended for him last Saturday. It was a disappointing loss with some questionable referee calls that ended in a 2-1 loss. It was an exciting game, but I’ll be honest and say this part of being a hockey Mom really sucks. It was so hard to see those disappointed expressions on those sweet children’s faces. They played a great game though and they still have their practices, parents against the kids game, and windup party to look forward too. It was Father son time the next day as my husband took our Captain to work. They both looked so handsome as they dressed up in a shirt and tie. I haven’t seen my son dressed up since his first communion last year. It struck me how fast he’s growing up! I’m so proud of his accomplishments on and off the ice. ā¤ļø

I have so much pride for my Captain and his team. šŸ˜ƒ

We also had a major accomplishment as my little Mad dog and I attended the play group specifically for children with special needs. He loved it there as it was fun and manageable with a small group of kids. The most touching moment was when my son thanked me for his happy. I was in awe of him and his gift of understanding in the moment. After the group we attended the indoor playground and he did very well being around more children and some noise. We were both happy to nap when we got home. šŸ˜“

“Thank you for my happy Mommy.”

So here we are back to Friday and since our Netflix is M.I.A. due to Mad dog resetting all the information we’ll be watching movies. My wonderful husband picked up Night at the Museum for family movie night and Mocking Jay Part 1 for after they go to bed. Thank you for being here today and please check out everyone else’s post who links up today. šŸ’•

That’s my Friday’s Feats and Fails how’s your week been?

This is going to be an amazing weekend of watching the currents and the classics. šŸ˜ƒšŸŽ‰


It’s link up time! Don’t mind the HTML code I couldn’t convert it back to text just click on the link below that say inlinkz. šŸ˜‰

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Writer’s Quote Wednesday’sĀ 

ļ»æļ»æ

Amazing Grace came into the world so precious and sweet. 

Loved already with great devotion and adoration. 

With these beautiful curls and teeny, tiny, little, feet. 

I witnessed a Mother’s love, a Father’s pride as they held her skin to skin. 

And family was to be wrapped up in joy with this little gift. 

Not knowing how long she’d be earth side, each day is a win. 

I look at these beautiful images, and they give my heart a lift.  

I play them over and over again feeling the tenderness in my heart and mind.

Amazing Grace you’re the greatest blessing the world could ever find. šŸ’—

I wrote this for my beautiful cousin who gave birth to her amazing Grace just this week. She was born with a genetic condition called mosaic triploidy. It’s not certain how long this little blessing will have on the earth. One thing I know it will be filled with so much love, that her little heart can hold. This is my submission to http://silverthreading.com for Writer’s Quote Wednesday. Please check out all the talent who link up. Thank you. šŸ’•

*Image used with permission from my cousin and Love By Krista Evans Photography. Special thanks to them both for allowing me to share this journey.*

You can check out her amazing body of work at https://www.facebook.com/lovebykristaevansphotography

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In order to know who we are, we must learn where we come from

I sit here in the darkness thinking of a story I feel compelled to write of my ancestors. As part of my Blogging 101 assignment we are to write a blog to our dream reader. I would direct my blog to my family to learn of our ancestors

Life in the new world.

Life in the new world.

who came off the boat for dreams of a better life. After the devastation of the Great Potatoe famine of 1845-1849 they survived and without them I wouldn’t be here today to tell this story. Michael and Elizabeth left Ireland at the age of nineteen for Scotland, then travelled by ship to South Hampton, England. They landed in New York with two daughters Annie and Roseanne in tow. Which for anyone who’s read Gangs of New York, or seen the movie it was a dangerous time to be Irish indeed! They made their way to Boston and settled in for awhile. With competition for jobs, financial security, and food being scarce with the population boom, they made their way to Canada and settled in Fernie, BC.

My Great Grandfather Michael found work in the mines and was there for twenty-nine years. They hadn’t lived there long when a devastation  ravaged the town with floods from 1848, to 1947, the mining disaster in May of 1908 that  killed one hundred and three miners,  and the Great Fire of August. 1 st of 1908 that destroyed the town. My Great Grandma Elizabeth was pregnant with my Gram Margaret and due to give birth anytime. There was ten lives lost and thousands of homes burnt to the ground. A lot of hardship and sadness that my ancestors had to encounter in the new land. My Gram made it safely into the world as the hospital and the church were the few buildings that were left.

Time passed on with my Gram and her sisters growing up and their parents had added on to their family with four more daughters Thresa, Nellie, Elizabeth, Josephine and a son Peter. More hardship would come to the family as the mine would be closed in order to investigate the fire of 1908. My Great Grandpa Michael had to find work elsewhere. All the daughters worked as well, or helped look after the youngest children. That was the life back then, everyone had a strong work ethic and supported one another. I remember my sweet Gram Margaret telling me stories of her housekeeping days, collecting oranges at the trainyard, and working as a caddy at the golf course.

A tragic accident in 1917, took the life of the youngest family member Josephine and she died at the age of two, with severe burns to the chest and abdomen in. Poor baby girl lighting up the world with her beauty and smile, and for her life to be snuffed out like a candle is so sad. Peter, the only son of eight children returned home from World War 1 in fell ill as well. He succumbed to cerebral meningitis at the age of twenty-six on March. 17 th 1922. He was to sing in the St. Patrick’s day concert that evening for the Knights of Columbus, and he sat up in bed and sang then died. The song that he sang was Danny Boy, a beautiful Irish melody that is dear to my heart to this day. My beloved Gram couldn’t talk about her only brother and baby sister without shedding many tears.

Time marched on and my Gram’s sisters were marrying and her turn came to fall in love and get married too. Her and my Grandpa were all set to wed when my Great Grandma fell ill a week before the wedding and died of endocarditis at the age of fifty-three. There was to be a big church wedding in 1929 as the last one of the family to get married, but instead it was a small ceremony in the priests quarters. How tragic for my family to lose their one and only Mom. A pain I today know all too well…

So much tragedy for one family to endure let alone survive the grief! Now I know why I’ve survived my pain and peril, it’s in my DNA. To turn grief into gratitude, and pain into power! My Mom came a year later in 1930 after the Great Depression and she was loved and cherished and would remain my Grandparents only child. She took three days to come into the world, and my poor sweet Gram nearly died in childbirth. Even those times were tough after the stock market crash, my Grandpa continuing mining and supporting his family. My Gram had her five sisters and they were very close to their Father, the only living parent she had and she looked after him into his senior years. My Grandpa went off to war in 1938 when my dear Mom was only nine years old. For the next six years my Gram raised her daughter as a single parent while looking after her Father. When my Grandpa returned home he didn’t recognize this teenage girl my Mom had become.

She was wearing makeup, curling her hair, and going to picture shows with her friends. He had to get to know his family all over again and he did. They settled into a comfortable excistence and my Gram’s youngest sister went off to live in the USA and attend the convent. She proudly became a nun and took the name of Sister Michael. She loved her vocation and took up teaching in the convent. Tragically she was in a car accident and died at the age of thirty-two. It was a death that affected the whole family, as Elizabeth was living far away and they didn’t see her very often. With raising their families and being busy with life and they hadn’t lost anyone since their Mom.

I remember my own beloved Mama telling me stories of her Aunt Elizabeth her kindness, devotion to God, and her beautiful smile that would light up a room. My Gram had her two sisters living in the same town and one out of town and her Father. He was getting older and suffering with diabetes and Coronary Thrombosis. He lived until eighty-one years old and died of acute diverticulitis in 1951. My poor Gram was so devoted to her dear Father that his death left a void in her life and heart.

My Mom went on to marry my Dad and they had six children who all married and had children of their own. I look back over all my family history and I feel very grateful. My parents lived a very long life, saw their children happy, and had beautiful Grandchildren and Great Grandchildren to spend their remaining years with. My parents only knew my oldest son so there’s a sadness in me that they didn’t get to watch him grow up on this earthly plane. And they didn’t know my youngest either. I know with each memory and picture I share I’m keeping their love alive. As I truly believe in order to for us to know our future, we must discover our past.

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My heart is on my sleeve

Lately in my writing I have been sharing a lot about my personal struggles. I didn’t know starting my blog a year ago that it would turn into my online diary! I’m glad it has though because honestly, it’s the best therapy I’ve ever received. I’ve found a kinship here with my lovely readers that has filled my love bucket to the brim. You have got me through some difficult times, even more than my own family and friends have. With your supportive comments, advise, and genuine love and care for my well being. I know this to be true, because I can feel it. I’ve let the spirit guide me in a lot of decisions in my life. After suffering so much grief in the last 6 years I couldn’t trust myself, only my instincts. And trusting my empathic nature has opened up a lot of wonderful doors for me. I recently shared with a new friend my son’s struggles with his sensory condition, and other symptoms of ASD traits I’m seeing emerging now as he gets older. She will be helping me with learning about essential oils that will help to keep him calm and regulated. After all his blood work we will also see a naturopath. Another friend has shared her educational background and had offered to help me get him ready for preschool in the new year. I’m so grateful as it’s been a struggle for us with potty training, feeling confident to be in large groups, and the fear of me not being with him. With her assistance I’m confident that he can have that neurotypical experience that other children can have. I knew as soon as my youngest son was born he was my sensitive child. He didn’t open up his eyes for 5 days, was rolling completely over at 4 days old, and reacting violently to all the tests administered in the NICU. I literally though he was going to punch a nurse as I watched his little fists ball up in anger!!! I watched him struggle with sensory issues and suffer with jaundice and losing weight, since his early arrival in the world. I have always been fascinated with his strength as he’s been my little champion since day one. My Doctors told me he would be delayed with speech, motor skills, and developmentally behind. I watched him go through the phases and reach his goals a little later than what the books said, but I didn’t care. Like every other obstacle in his young life he faces it head on with stubbornness, tenacity, and strength. So a new diagnosis, a new therapy, new helpers won’t phase him. He’s always had a goal since birth, and that has been to experience and soak up as much life as possible. His strong capacity to love and understand the hearts and minds of everyone he meets, leaves me in awe. I love seeing the world through his eyes, as it teaches me that life doesn’t have to filled with fear and worry but more joy and wonder. I’ve been blessed with both my sons and a platform to share that with you. And my little blog has gotten some attention from being a guest blog post on http://howmybrainworks.weebly.com and recently from http://featuredemagazine.com/freshly-featured/
I have been so grateful for the recognition and literary love. I’ve cried a lot of happy tears instead of sad ones, and to me that’s been a gift. I want to thank you for coming to my little part of the world. To read my stories, share comments, and conversations. Your words touch my heart, fill me me strength, and fill me with purpose. Namaste my lovelies thank you for understanding my heart that I wear on my sleeve. ā¤ļø

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