Jsack's Mom's Blog

Welcome to my blog where I share my special needs parenting journey with my heart, truth, and love, one story at a time. ❤️

Ten Things of Thankful-Feeling the love

The day of love is upon us as I cozy up under my cozy fleece blanket and cuddle up with my family and feel thankful for the smiles, laughter, tears, and most of all love. Here I am to share my week with the lovely hosts of TTOT linkup while the lovely Lizzi enjoys her travels. 

I’m thankful for the blessing of being here with my family. I think of so many times in my life I didn’t think I would ever realize this dream about becoming a Mom. Now here I am cuddling with my precious boys and feeling full of love and bliss. 

I’m thankful for the beautiful gifts of flowers, a wonderful meal and a lovely card my adoring husband gave to me. He spoiled me in all thewonderful  ways and our son’s treated us to a V.I.P. restaurant experience. 

I’m thankful after a mid season hiatus that season six of The Walking Dead premiered tonight. My husband and I are huge fans and we’ve been counting the days till it was back on the air. I won’t give away any spoilers to any other fans. I will only say that it had everything I ever wanted in an action packed, turbulent, jaw dropping, firestorm of emotional thrill ride episode! 

I’m thankful that the reward chart that I’ve been using with my son has worked out so well. He’s been very helpful and we’ve figured out some of his triggers and ways to work with them. He’s done so well that he’s earned himself a special day out that I look forward to sharing with you next week. 

I’m thankful that he also offered to read to me tonight without me having to ask or beg. He does love to read to himself but not out loud. He enjoys adventure chapter books, Diary of a Wimpy kids comics and the Hardy Boys. He found a Jurassic Park book and was excited to read to me and his little brother. I’ve discovered if he finds something interesting he’ll want to share it with me. It’s a win/win for both of us. 

I’m thankful that my youngest son is finally over his chest cold. My poor little boy has been so sick lately and it tears out my heart to see him struggling with his breathing. Next will be asthma and allergy testing to see if there’s anything underlying with him having a weakened immune system. 

I’m thankful that he’s been able to sleep the last couple of nights. I don’t sleep when he’s not sleeping I just drift in and out of consciousness. I was so exhausted this week I fell asleep at 9:30 pm with a book, snack, and my phone in my hand. That was a restful sleep that was sorely needed and the ability to unplug helped tremendously too. 

I’m thankful for a fabulous Valentine’s Day having a family hot tub soak. It was the perfect day for laughs, making plans, and filling each other in on the events of our week. I love moments like this no matter where we live we always have each other. 

I’m thankful for groceries in my pantry, food in my fridge and a roof above mine and my family’s head. In times likes these during this recession not everyone has one or many of those blessings. I’m grateful for how hard my husband works to provide these for our family. 

I’m thankful for time off for the week. Tomorrow is a province wide family day and my kids are out of school as well for a convention. I’ve planned some down time as well as some fun activities that I look forward to surprising them with. 

  

21 Comments »

One liner Wednesday

There’s that feeling in the air with the kids back to school. Organization of school schedules and tired kids are the result in that first week. We had some school shopping to accomplish before my youngest went to preschool. So I woke him up and I was doing my best to motivate him. He looked at me and said “give me a break Mom, it’s my day off” and promptly crawled back into his bed. That’s my cheeky monkey. 🙊

This has been my submission to One Liner Wednesday check out all the funny, sweet, and inspiration there today! 

2 Comments »

Ten Things of Thankful

  
Another week has passed to recollect thankful days and grateful nights. I have to admit I’m struggling this week with years of tears that want to pour forth. I will do my best to articulate them here, or you may just see me bleed upon the page. Here’s to Lizzi and the TTOT Linkup my favourite spot to visit on the weekends. 😃

I’m thankful for my family. My sister took my oldest son for a holiday and it was good for all of us to miss and have some quality time with each other. 

I’m thankful for hiking and the beautiful scenery and moments of clarity I experience. Sharing that with my husband and youngest son is so special. We even made a friend along the way. 

  
  
I’m thankful for walks in the woods and nature and all it’s beauty. I always feel such a spiritual connection with God’s glorious creations. We’re all one, feeling the heartbeat of all life and love. 

I’m thankful for trips to the zoo with my zany family, and our two little monkeys that are so excited to climb, laugh, and explore. Our favourites are the Penguins and seeing their family’s having fun showing off for all their fans. 

   

 
I’m thankful for my memories and friendships. I’ve been struggling this week with the passing of my sweet friend 3 months ago. Everywhere I looked and every song I heard made me feel that ache of missing her. But I reached out to a mutual friend and she was able to help me with my grief. 

I’m thankful for the truth, even if it hurts. I am a seeker of knowledge and I dig until I find what I’m looking for. Sometimes it’s hard to face the truth of a matter, but I’d rather face that and it’s discomfort than live in a web of lies. It’s the unspoken truth of humanity that always keeps me guessing and searching. 

I’m thankful for overcoming obstacles and rising to the challenge. I completed my latest fitness challenge and I’m learning so much building my Beach Body coaching business. I’m lighter, leaner, and stronger, and I finally feel hopeful instead of harbouring pain in my mind, body, and spirit. 

I’m thankful for this beautiful spot I found on my favourite hike. I sat here to muse about life, love, and thoughts that need to be written and shared. 

  
I’m thankful for this rock it’s on this rock that I found my strength and belief in myself. Where I decided to make my dreams come true of writing my book and how to fund it. My son and I scrambled up here and wanted to show off our muscles for Daddy. 

  
I’m thankful for the generousity of family and friends. My sisters who love me and are my greatest most fulfilling friendships. They give me the gift of time, the smiles on my children’s faces, laughter, and fresh produce from ones garden, and homemade hummus and chips from the other. My in-laws gifted me with a beautiful new set of dishes as we’ve been using the same ones since my bridal shower. And my sweet friend I, I’m grateful for the words of encouragement and compassion right when I needed them the most. ❤️

10 Comments »

One Liner Wednesday’s

I’m lying here reflecting on something funny my oldest son said to me this week. He’s quite a handsome boy and he gets along well with his classmates. One in particular was batting eyes at him and said I want to be your girlfriend and go on a date. My son was so perplexed he replied “I’m not even 46 I can’t even deal with that right now!” Oh did I ever giggle, great answer son don’t ever be in too much of a hurry to grow up. 😉

This has been my submission to Linda G Hill One Liner Wednesday. Please check out all the inspiration, and humour of everyone who links up. Thank you. 😘❤️

6 Comments »

Ten Things of Thankful 

  
Here it is my time of the week to express my thankfulness. I think we should be thankful every time we wake up breathing. Today I celebrate with Lizzi and her kindness family for TTOT reaching its two year anniversary! Kindness and thankfulness should be spread everywhere and I’ll jump on that VW bus and start promoting that daily! I’ve been participating for three weeks now in this very special linkup and it’s my happy place to be in the blogosphere. So without further ado onto the link up. 😃
https://summat2thinkon.wordpress.com/ten-things-of-thankful/

1. I’m thankful for my gorgeous, goofy boys who make me laugh out loud with their ridiculous antics. If I’m having a day filled with sadness they lift me up with laughter. 

2. I’m thankful that I had a wonderful time on my son’s field trip to the zoo. I got to be a parent volunteer in his group and get to know some of his classmates that I don’t talk to regularly. I also got to see how well liked my son is. Being the new kid on the block a year ago was a difficult struggle for him and us. So seeing him thriving in his classroom environment made me so proud. ❤️

3. I’m thankful that my week without having a functioning fridge is over. I made do with a little bar fridge until our new one was delivered yesterday. You don’t realize how important those amenities are until you lose the use of a much needed appliance. Here’s to solid ice cream and ice cubes again. 😉

4. I’m thankful for reaching out to a friend when I was struggling to find my smile. Sometimes it’s within those vulnerable moments we find our greatest strengths. 

5. I’m thankful for another successful Bloggy Throwback on the Original Bunker Punks website. Each week I see more bloggers linking up reading and sharing some wonderful talent. This amazing site is finally getting it’s name out there. I’m so proud to be a part of something so fresh, fun, and fabulous. This was the first site I was ever published on and now I’m helping to make it a big success. 😃

5. I’m thankful for working hard on my self care by getting my daily workout in. All the support I’ve received on my fitness journey makes me feel so grateful. 

6. I’m thankful no matter how far I move away from my Mommy group we’re still a special part of each other lives. Only a phone call, text, FaceTime, and message away from each other. 💝

7. I’m so grateful to my awesome friend Punk Rock Papa for letting me be part of the OBP. I started running Bloggy Throwback a month ago and watching it grow has been a great source of pride. This special friend and I connected through our words, our hearts, and our families.  He’s like my brother from another Mother. I love him and his wonderful family so much. ❤️

8. I’m thankful for the sunshine and spending time with my family. It really is the elixir in my life, besides wine. 😉

9. I’m thankful for my ability to tell a story. I have always believed we all have one to share. And when I close my eyes at night all the blog ideas, characters dialogue, and sentence structure come dancing through my head. I love being creative and jotting those gems down before they disappear with the moon beams. 

10. I’m thankful for being safe, warm, fed, and loved. Without these basic needs I would be struggling like many are in the world. I’m grateful I can help the ones I can, and that God has blessed me abundantly with my family to love. 

25 Comments »

I’m not ready to say goodbye

  
When I got the news today my knees hit the floor and I cried with a vengeance. No I screamed in my head you weren’t supposed to die! Someone so loving, giving, caring with the biggest, most beautiful heart wasn’t supposed to leave this earth. Now that you’re gone, I’ve held my children tighter. Knowing that you won’t be physically there to hold yours tears me apart. This wasn’t supposed to happen. I just sent you a message last week telling you how I loved and missed you. 
You drove that stretch of road so many times, for so many different reasons. Why should today be any different? Why would this trip from point A to point B be your last? Life just isn’t fair sometimes, people are born and people will die everyday. But not you, or never should’ve been you. Thinking of you alone and tumbling through the air as your vehicle left the road fills me such heartache I can scarcely breathe. Even now the tears fall silently down my face thinking of my memories of you. 

If I could write a book I would fill it with my thoughts of you. The way your eyes danced when you were mischievous, the way your laughter bubbled out of you with abundant joy. The way you made me feel when you hugged me so tight. How you’d say “Mama we can get through anything, because we’re survivors, it’s what we do!” And I know it’s your words ringing true in my head and heart today. 

I would fill each chapter with your wisdoms, all the times I quoted you for your brilliance. And how when you get so excited and start talking a mile a minute, I would from and I’d say “breathe love, you’re not going anywhere.” I was wrong you always were going somewhere as you filled up your life and love with people who adored you as much as I did. You never said no, or turned anyone away. You’d drive across the province to lend a helping hand, make your kids happy, make life easier for someone else it was your way. Anyone who experienced your love was changed forever. 

Even now I read all the kind and wonderful words people have left behind. They too are mourning your loss. They won’t see your beautiful smile when they walk through the doors of your work. Greeting them with warm hellos and how are you today? Your bosses were blessed to have you as long as they did, and I was so happy that they told you so. You mattered to many, and not only your family mourns you but a whole community does. 

To touch so many lives and hearts for your short time on earth was a gift. You filled my life with sunshine and love. And my children adored you as I do yours. What will happen to them now that they’re gone? They will never have to question your love for them. They felt that in everything you did. From the sweet little nicknames you gave them, to teaching them independence, to your beautiful smile and Mama bear hugs. I pray that they will all stay together to heal in their grief. You etched an imprint on their hearts that will never fade or be replaced by another. You were their North Star guiding them to safe harbour. You were their quiet place when the world was noisy and annoying. 

You were their safety net when others let them down. Who do they follow now that the light has burnt out in your eyes? My answer is no one, you were their light, love, soft heart, their Mother; there will never be another. You were the yin to my yang, and talked me off the ledge plenty of times in that gentle way you had. I still remember the first time we met. How you smiled that mega watt grin and said hello and extended your hand to me. I was new to town and knew no one. You looked at my son in my arms and stroked his cheek and I felt safe with you. You patted his head and said “so blonde, and so beautiful just like his Mama.” And in that instance I fell in love with your kind spirit. 

As our friendship grew stronger my love and admiration for you did too. That moment that you called me by my childhood nickname I was taken aback. I told you I hadn’t heard it since my Mom died how did you know? You said “it just fit, it was perfect it was who you are.” And then I gave you a nickname and I never called you anything but. We bonded over so many things, but the loss of our Mothers affected our whole beings. You knew of that pain of wanting the one and only women we had ever loved and trusted, more than anyone in the world to hold us. You had been a few years into your grief, and I was year into mine. 

You saw the pain in my eyes that I tried to hide from others, but you recognized it instantly as you had your own. I was coming back to town soon and I knew I was going to see you. I was going to pop into your work and surprise you. I knew I could do that because you were never a slave to social media, and how you gently teased me about “my need for my social newsfeed.” I picture the look on your face as you looked up to see who was coming in the door, and how you’d run out and give me the tightest hug. Now I will come back and see you one last time, as my heart is stacked with pain and remorse. I don’t want to say goodbye to you. I’m not ready, prepared, or able to do so. Today when you left the world a small fragment of me went with you. To a place I pray is your happy place. 

We talked about heaven and what you thought was waiting for you there. How you hoped it would have beautiful mountains, lakes and trees that you so dearly loved in your town. I was so sad when I had to leave you behind when I moved away. I wouldn’t have got through those four months of solo parenting while my husband worked away, without you. When I asked your help you told me “I love you and I love your son’s I will help you, we will make this work.” And how my kids loved when you and the girls would come over. The dance parties, games, the singing, and cupcakes. I always seemed to have a never ending supply of happiness when you were around. And after the kids went to bed the copious amounts wine we would drink and the laughs we would have. 

I don’t want to say goodbye to you it’s just too hard to even mouth those words. I’m devastated like your family is, they had you longer so I don’t even feel a right to my feelings. How do they go on without you? When can they speak your name without dissolving into tears like I do? Thinking of not seeing that mischievous grin or hearing infectious laughter makes me want to scream it’s just not right, or fair! Somehow life will go on, people will go to work, kids will go to school, the earth will keep spinning on its axis. Even though I feel it’s all off kilter and imbalanced waiting for you to come back. 

I feel you nearby watching and waiting not able to take your journey to the other side. You remain fixed until you know everyone is ok. This is how you were in life, and I wouldn’t expect anything less from you in death. I’m just not going to get over losing you. There will be a space in my heart that is the shape of you. You were such an amazing friend, sister of my heart, Mother, daughter sister, Aunty, and cousin. There will never be a day where I speak your name and the memories of wonderful you will come flooding back. I hold those close to my heart for that’s all I have left now. Until we meet again my sweet friend, I will keep you and your family in my heart and prayers always. ❤️

 

30 Comments »

One Liner Wednesday

My son is four going on fourteen.  I swear I’m dealing with a prepubescent teenager most days. Tonight I asked him to get pj’s on, pick up his toys, and brush his teeth. He still continued playing and ignoring me. I repeated it once again and his reply was “Mom don’t talk my ear off all day!” I sat there and laughed and then he joined in telling me how funny he is. 😃

This has been my submission to One liner Wednesday with Linda G Hill Please check out her one liner and all the other talent who link up. Thank you. 💕

5 Comments »

One Liner Wednesday 

It was a day of a thousand questions from my four year old. We were FaceTiming with his Dad from work and our son was leaning in and  crushing my chest. So I moved him as I was becoming a uniboob and it was painful. Anyways I adjusted myself, and then cuddled my son in close only to hear him reply “Mom stop, you’re crushing my boob!” My husband was laughing so hard he couldn’t breathe! Out of the mouth of babes. 😉
This has been my submission to One Liner Wednesday’s with Linda G. Hill please check out the hilarity and inspiration in her link up. Thank you. ❤️

16 Comments »

One Liner Wednesday 

I’ve been enjoying some spring weather in my part of Canada and on Monday I went out geocaching with my husband and our youngest son. We had a set of stairs to climb and he eagerly conquered the challenge. His Dad and I were following closely behind when he reached the top stair. He turned around and yelled at the top of his lungs

“I’m king of the world !”
This has been my submission to https://Lindaghill.com One Liner Wednesday. Please check out her contribution, as well as all the other talent who link up. Thank you. 💓

  

4 Comments »

One liner Wednesday

Now that my preschooler son and I have completed week one of potty training, we’re on to bigger adventures like navigating trying on underwear. I swear he’s having a fashion show trying on all the pairs. Well life had to continue on as laundry had to get folded and dinner had to get prepared. My son came running out of his room with both legs stuck in one leg hole yelling at the top of his lungs “Mommy help me my underwear is hurting my feelings!”
My son the natural born comedian. 😉

This has been my submission to http://Lindaghill.com. Check out her contribution and all the other talent that link up. Thank you. 💗

2015/01/img_3410.jpg

6 Comments »