Jsack's Mom's Blog

Welcome to my blog where I share my special needs parenting journey with my heart, truth, and love, one story at a time. ❤️

Science of Parenthood book review

  
Have you ever had a book come into your life right when you needed it the most? I have a handful of times it’s like the right book was searching for me as I was it. This marvellous book I’m referring to is the Science of Parenthood written by Norine Dworkin and illustrated by Jessica Ziegler. 
I signed up to be part of their #Boogiewipes Science of Parenthood blog tour and I’m also proud to be a #Boogieblogger. I received this book as an ARC (acquired reading copy) for my honest review. It arrived in my mailbox on Christmas Eve and I was tickled pink to see it there. I eagerly dived into it getting lost in the pages while my cookies baked and I left my kitchen a disaster. 

Covered in flour and cinnamon is how I spend most of my December with Christmas baking so that day  was no different. My son had been sick nineteen days out of the month so I was grateful for my reading break! I began to giggle as I read the scientific explanations of what Norine had explained in relation to parenting. 

To say I liked this book is an understatement I absolutely loved it! The information backed up with scientific data as well as the tongue and cheek way it was presented made me giggle late into the night under my covers hoping I wouldn’t wake my sleeping household! I really related to to the chapter on Darwin Parents: Adapt or Die! As I believe this is what parenthood is all about. Constantly adapting to sleeping, feeding, bathing yourself and your children. Then just when you figure it out and get cocky and say out loud “I got this” your kids will change up the game and you’re back at square one! 

My favourite paragraph in the chapter is as follows:

“Whoever coined the phrase “change is good” clearly never woke up every two hours to feed a newborn. Or paced 26.2 miles round the living room, trying to soothe a screaming infant. Or went ten days without showering because she was too exhausted to care. Or notice.”

It’s like the heavens opened up and the clouds parted and the angel chorus sang Hallejuah to me when I read that, because this is my life! My kids were never sleepers, not the babies that you bring home from the hospital and are sleeping by one month. No they never got that memo and I’m still trying to fax it to my son’s bedside at 4.5 years old! 

The chapter on potty training left me in stitches as we went through it last year. He was a little late with all of the steps with having some special needs. Now it’s a big production in the bathroom I cringe when I hear those words “come see what I did Mommy, it’s right there!” Then the road trips for hockey I hear “stop the truck I have to pee.” But you just went before we left the house.” Which means nothing to a preschooler.  I soon find out it’s much more fun to pee on Daddy’s tires than a toilet! 

  
Reading this graph had me hysterics as we go through this every time we go to grocery store or are stuck in a lineup shopping. I ask all the questions as described and get a no, I’m fine, let’s go, then it’s holding his bottom screaming “I got to go now!” It makes running errands an Olympic event as I pick up my child and run through the aisles to find the nearest bathroom. 

  
This particular case above wonderfully illustrated by Jessica described my Christmas. I love to build things Legos, blocks, puzzles you name it I want to build it. I was so excited to give my oldest son a box of Connext so we could build some awesome structures with it. He was kind enough when he opened it to say “thanks Mom that’s cool” but I seen his eyes light up when guitar hero was the next gift unwrapped. I just can’t compete with rock and roll so if you can’t beat them join them. 

This book is a must have for every expectant parent it will be my token baby shower gift from now on. It’s leading the charts in the categories of Parenting, Motherhood, and Funny books and is available on Amazon. I would recommend Science of Parenthood to anyone that’s done daycare it will keep you laughing. You’ll be nodding your head in agreement so much like me you’ll think you’re one of those bobble head dolls! Enjoy then you can say you read a book like this famous Doctor who’s definitely one of my favourites. 

“The perfect field manual for all the parents out there who can do nothing else with their day but laugh.”

-MEHMET OZ, MD, father, grandfather, and Emmy Award-winning host of the Dr. Oz Show. 

(So true Dr.Oz)

  
About the Authors

Norine Dworkin-McDaniel 

Norine is the co-author and principal writer of Science of Parenthood. A longtime magazine writer, Norine’s articles and essays have appeared in just about every women’s magazine you can buy at supermarket checkout as well as on The Huffington Post, Parenting.com and Scary Mommy. Norine is the co-author of You Know He’s a Keeper…You Know He’s a Loser: Happy Endings and Horror Stories from Real Life Relationships (Perigee), Food Cures (Reader’s Digest) and a contributor to several humor anthologies, including Have Milk, Will Travel: Adventures in Breastfeeding(Demeter Press). She lives with her husband and 9-year-old son son in Orlando.

Jessica Ziegler

The daughter of famed New Yorker cartoonist Jack Ziegler, Jessica is Science of Parenthood’s co-author and illustrator. In her “off hours,” Jessica is the director of social web design for VestorLogic and the writer/illustrator of StoryTots, a series of customizable children’s books. Jessica was named a 2014 Humor Voice of the Year by BlogHer/ SheKnows Media. Her writing and illustration have been published on The Huffington Post, InThePowderRoom.com, Vegas.com and in Las Vegas Life and Las Vegas Weekly. She lives with her husband and 11-year-old son in Denver.

 Together, Jessica and Norine are the creators of The Big Book of Parenting Tweets and The Bigger Book of Parenting Tweets, published earlier in 2015. 

Science of Parenthood is available in soft cover and e-book on Amazon

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Visit the website to see where abouts Norine and Jessica are on the #Boogiewipesblogtour. 

Follow along to see the Book tour Cities/Dates it might be in your town next. 

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 I know what I’m fighting for, my peace of mind

I have been in a journey for the last three years. It’s been a long hard battle with my youngest child to discover what I always thought, he has a neurological disorder. I have known as a premature baby he would have developmental delays. He was speech delayed and that was something I started working on since his birth. I read stories, described my daily activities, and sang to him all the time. His first words were Mama, Dada, hi, bye, and Baba (for brother). 

I was happy he was able to say these small words at 18 months. I was using sign language with him at a 12 months, but he only used a few signs for food, sorry, thank you, and happy. When it came to pronunciation is where he struggled the most at 2 years old. So I worked with him turning b’s into d’s and emphasizing the ways words sounded. I went through the process of registering him for evaluation when he was 2.5 years old. My Dr. gave me some pamphlets, and it was my health nurse that let me know about a child development agency I could contact. 

So far my son has had two family doctors, a pediatrician, developmental pediatrician, an ENT, and a children’s sleep specialist. He has also worked with a child development councillor, occupational therapist, and speech and language therapist. Because the first pediatrician didn’t classify him as having ASD we weren’t offered any help. We were moving to a new province so I could access resources there. Here we are another year into our journey and I have him re-evaluated for autism. He tests low for that criteria, but higher for ADHD. 

Since he’s only four, children in Canada aren’t tested till they reach the age of six. I’ve filled out enough paperwork, blood tests, and questionnaires to fill a filing cabinet! Even though my son has been delayed in some skills he has reached them. His recent accomplishments have been becoming potty trained. We worked on this for a year establishing sensory awareness so he would know what his body needed to do. I jumped for joy when he was able to catch a balloon followed by a ball on his birthday.  He also started dressing himself and putting on his own shoes on the proper feet. 

If his pants end up on backwards as well as his underwear I still celebrate his accomplishments. After filling out new paperwork I feel that these huge accomplishments have been negated. Due to having a delay his fine motor and gross motor skills have been affected. This has led to a diagnosis of global development delay. To hear those words in the office hit my heart like an out of control freight train. Knocking me off balance in this carefully, constructed, world we’ve built to keep him calm and regulated with his sensory integration disorder. 

Now I’m given a list of OT’s (Occupational therapists) to contact to get a consult. I’ve been told he needs OT, PT, (physical therapy) and SLP (speech and language therapy) immediately. I have been his Mom OT, PT, and SLP for the last eighteen months. Now I have to step aside and let the professionals do their work. This is so hard giving up this control of the life we have. I knew my son couldn’t hold a pencil properly so I have him practice drawing letters and numbers in sugar, to get the feel of the movements. 

I also found out he can’t balance on either foot, jump with two feet together 20 inches. I didn’t see these as detriments just something that needed fine tuning. So I started doing yoga with him to help him work on his balance. Which is due to a weaker vestibular sense affecting his inner ear and brain. Instead of jumping two footed I had him skip instead. I wanted and needed him to feel proud of these developments instead of being told he was just delayed. We have been a strong team working, playing, and discovering new and exciting things. 

This new frontier that we’re embarking on is scary one. His thyroid levels (TSH)  are higher than normal so he has to be tested every three months in case the Free T4 (affecting development) are out of their expected range. It’s known as sub clinical hypothyroidism and a definition that basically means “don’t worry till both TSH and Free T4 are high.” Global Developmemtal Delay can be caused by many factors such as fetal alcohol spectrum disorder FASD (caused by a Mother drinking excessively during her pregnancy), a genetic defect known as Down’s Syndrome, Fragile X syndrome Frag X (which is an inherited cognitive impairment Disoder). It can also be caused by medical problems encountered with prematurity, and no known cause. 

I can rule out FASD, I had a healthy pregnancy I was just very sick throughout my first trimester. My son doesn’t have Down’s syndrome as I had no markers for it in my genetic testing. He was born one month premature after my one and only beloved Mama, died in my eighth month. My pediatrician thinks he may have Frag X and the only way we can determine that is with genetic testing. 

I have put that on hold for now since that’s not a decision I can make for him as a young child. Once that test is administered it follows a person for the rest of their life. It can affect him applying for life insurance. Once the blood test determines whether someone has Frag X or not, those results always have to disclosed. If my son is a candidate for this impairment he got it from me. Only a Mother can pass it along to the male, and a Father can pass it along to a female. I have felt enough guilt in my life due to his premature birth. I can’t make a heavy decision like this that will affect him for his lifetime! 

I’ve spent a few sleepless nights going over this again and again until my sleep deprived brain scream enough I can’t take it anymore! He is being tested for allergies to see if that’s the cause of his sleep disorder he was diagnosed with last year. After those pending results we will have to do a private sleep clinic. I can only imagine how stressful that will be with his sensory disorder. Being hooked up to machines to monitor his every move and watched all night while I’m by his side. I already get anxious and feel heart palpitations coming on just thinking about it. 

I don’t even know how to talk about this so its just easier to write about it. I don’t have many people in my life that understand all these conditions and disorders. And if I did I moved away from them, which leaves me floating adrift in a lonely sea of doubt and anxiety. I know what I’ve been fighting for all these months, it’s my peace of mind. It’s to know that my son will get the resources and services he needs to prepare him for preschool and beyond. This is a very precarious time as the end of the school year approaches for my oldest son. My husband and I are determined to give them an amazing summer holiday as we were moving last year. And really the last two weeks were fun when we took time off from unpacking. Now we’re settled in our new home and province, and we’re going to be tourists and go on an adventure of discovery and fabulous fun! 

Now I know I’ll also be interviewing OT’s, setting up funding applications, and preparing my son for preschool. As well as my oldest son for his new adventure into the next grade. I know what all the sleepless, stress filled, long nights of staring at the vast emptiness as my tears cloud my vision are for. It’s to see light at the end of the long, dark, windy, tunnel. And if I can’t see it then  I’m getting a shovel and digging underneath, until I see what I so desperately need to lift me up out of this pit I’ve stumbled into. 

This has been my Sunday confession with More Than Cheese and Beer please check out her confession, anonymous ones on her Facebook page, and all the other talent who link up. Thank you. 💝

 

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